Epic Soreness and the Case of the Phantom Fat Roll

I've resigned myself to forever having busted knees and shins. I don't think that I am capable of sustaining scab and bruise free skin on my lower extremities. If there is the possibility of a gash or a welt, by God I will exploit it. My knees took a beating yesterday. Between the burpees, the snatches and the deadlifts, the skin was sure to be strawberried up in no time.

At this stage in the game if I'm not nursing muscle soreness, busted knees or broken callouses on my palms I feel strangely lost. In the instance of missing soreness, I begin to feel soft and puffy, almost floating instead of grounded and stable. It's strange, I fully admit to that. When I woke up this morning at 4am to use the restroom, the roll to my side left me no questions as to how Sunday would pan out. It would be slow and thoughtful because holy hell I felt it all. Every major muscle group in my body was perfectly toasted. I could walk (thank you!) and lift, but not fast or careless. I wasn't injured (except the damn foot from the 3 miler last Tuesday, damn!) and that was exciting... I felt extra accomplished.

Yesterday at our post-Crossfit ring of fire challenge meal, fellow x-fitters and myself were discussing the strange quality of the "Phantom Fall Roll" and how no matter how much weight you lose, the lingering discomfort of being bigger than you want to be sticks around....For a lot longer than it actually should. It's a strange thing, and most of us feel like complete idiots for feeling this way. Numbers don't lie. We are all blissfully more fit and stellar than we ever have been and yet, we glance in the mirror and still see our old selves. Obviously this behavior is not rooted in reality, it is reminiscent of an obsession into flaws that were present at one time; but while the actual flaws have lessened in intensity or disappeared all together, the knee jerk reaction to obsess about them is still there in full force.

Ok, problem has been stated, now what the hell do we do about it? I'm not really sure how to answer that question. Rather than bemoan feeling like a 15 year old, I'm going to spend some time and really solidify how fucking amazing I feel. If you feel amazing, you will look amazing, those two are inseparable. I'm hoping the rest will just fall back into line.

I'm embarking on 14 days of straight veggies, no fruit, tomorrow. We shall see how this unfolds. The sugar cravings will start in tomorrow around 3pm I'm sure, and the grumpy pants will slowly creep themselves up. Whew. You would think at some point I would tire of battling my inner 3-year old, but really it just gives me more strength to deal with the rest of the world. If you can conquer your inner beast, you can pretty much handle anything.